I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
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