As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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