i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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