dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
