I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
