Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Randomize
