Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
