I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
If I die, sorry about rent.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
