Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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