so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize