I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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