i just google imaged poop.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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