I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
