I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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