He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
