Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
