I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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