What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
