She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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