using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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