I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
