I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
