can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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