I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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