Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
