What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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