It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
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I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
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Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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