So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Randomize
