eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
