Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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