so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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