Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
