why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I take back everything I said about communal showers
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
