I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize