mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
