Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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