I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
