just tell him i said nine months
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize