she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
