Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
