I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
