Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
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