I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
