Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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