have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
