belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
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I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
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This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.