Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
There's always time for handjobs
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
