Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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