youre lurking in front of me
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
