she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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